Retirement – what is your next step?
This is one of the most common reasons that people come to see me. While travelling the world may hold an initial attraction (if you can afford it) retirees often express a desire to be more productive with their time in the long-term.
The first thing to think about is what you want to do with your time. After all, this is your retirement. Would you like to start a business? Take on charity work? Become a more active grandparent?
From my experience, retirees that have a range of activities that keep them busy, are the happiest and fulfilled. Keeping engaged with your life, community, family and friends will improve the quality of your life. Whatever you decide to do with your time, it’s vital that you feel productive and get a sense of fulfilment.
The reality is that how you choose to spend your time is an individual choice. What works for some may not work for others. I have seen people that want to spend all their time with their grandchildren and for them this gives them what they need. For others, this is simply not enough.
When I work with clients, I take the time to understand individual goals, and through the Rapid Results process, each goal is unique to you as an individual and completely measurable.
Unsure about what to do with your retirement? What I can tell you is that it is an exciting time of life. You have the opportunity to pursue your dreams and realise them. You might just need a little help getting there.
How a coach can help you
Habit of women
There has been a great deal of coverage in the media recently about the scourge of violence against women and children in South Africa. The question we keep asking ourselves is what can be done? There are the obvious external factors such an effective law enforcement, but what can be done to change society and the individual?
In my practice, a believe that a number of individual habits need to be changed, to change the way we treat women in our society. The high incidence of women and child abuse is founded in the way some people have been socialized. Unfortunately, this has become the new normal and hardwired in our brains, making it a habit.
Defining a habit
A habit is a pattern, the ways in which we present ourselves in a Physical-, Emotional- and Mental manner.
“Why we do, what we do, in Life and Business” (“Charles Duhigg”) Our physical manner incudes the way we dress, communicate, present ourselves, care for the environment and self-care.
Our emotional ways refers to your temperament, how you react to stimuli, ignore your emotional state to the point of slow or no action and activity.
Mental status refers to self-thought, the ability to set priorities. Approach to challenges and the scope of decision in a situation. The influence of your worldview on mental status.
How to change a habit
The first action to build a new habit to change the old unacceptable habit. This happens in the brain when new wiring is developed in support of the new habit.
New habits do not take long to develop, this can be achieved in a short period of time, depending on the intensity of the new habit and the exposure to prior experience. If a habit is deeply ingrained, it can take longer to change.
Physiological changes take place in the brain to adapt to the new habit.
With #BetterBrain I work with the coachee to achieve the new desired habit. It is important to identify what needs to be done to make the changes possible and focus on these actions.
Building new habit.
Attention and focus on required changes.
Repeat action cognitively.
Positive recognition every step of the way on achieving new habit.
What needs to change
The family system has become dysfunctional. The abusive hardwiring is unknown to fellow citizens until such time as an incident takes place. Individuals need to be aware of their own sexual intentions and seek professional help. Often gender-based crimes involve the abuse of power, which is the way some men are socialized.
Once the negative habit is acknowledged, such as the way we refer to women as sexual objects, the way we talk at our gatherings and the manner we look at women, only then are we able to change these habits.
While we seek solutions to these challenges, we need to look at the underlying negative habits. Once these have been acknowledged, change can take place. Through my coaching programme, metaphysical changes are possible.
It is important to remember that society as a whole has to work together to tackle this problem. From changing individual habits, to education, religious organisations and promoting appropriate male role models, we all have a part to play.